Reblogged
Reblogged madphantom
John Martin
I offered to come check on my friend's animals while she's away for the long weekend
She thinks I'm joking
But I'm ready
Wait. Are there 200, but to be numbered 1-250? Did I read those tags right? 😲
Yes there are actually 202 of them, the company sent 2 extra in the package, and I will be numbering them on the bottom with sharpie marker 1-250. This will ensure even if she manages to find all 202, she will never truly stop feeling like there might be a tiny duck somewhere unknown in the house. Lurking. Waiting to appear at the strangest time.
someone did this at a residential job i had and it was the best thing ever
Reblogged french-fry-0
@help-help-i-need-an-adult we've got raspberries fresh off the press!
My fave brand of Chocolate Guy's acts of Clowning on God is making fruit out of fruit. Not even chocolate, just straight up taking a fruit and using alchemy to make it into Fruit 2.0 as if to prove he's not playing god anymore, he's straight up commiting acts of primordial creation. Love that for him.
imagine if god reached down and plucked you and everyone you know, annihilated you, shredded you, and then reassembled you all in a mimicry of the human form
A small price to pay for becoming a ten times more beautiful version of myself and also made of chocolate.
Amaury picks up a raspberry
If you turn that raspberry back into a fucking raspberry...
He makes a raspberry out of raspberry
Son of a...
Reblogged
Anonymous asked:
What’s your stance on the whole „heterosexual sex is always degrading to the woman“ thing?
(TW: Sex)
I’m not sure if you’re thinking about a specific instance where this argument is currently being used or if you’re asking about it in general but: it’s a radfem/terf argument - and like any radfem/terf argument, it’s misogynistic and, frankly, stupid.
Telling women which kind of sex they are „allowed“ to enjoy is not a feminist thing to do. Denying that women can actively enjoy sex is not a feminist thing to do. Telling women they are unable to decide for themselves is not a feminist thing to do. Telling women that womanhood is by default degrading is not a feminist thing to do. And all of that obviously still applies when it’s aimed at women who have sex with men.
By the „sex with men is degrading“ logic, what are women who are exclusively attracted to men even supposed to do? Just never have sex at all? Have sex with women, despite not being attracted to them? Either of these options sounds a lot more degrading to me than them having consensual sex with the guys they happily want to have sex with.
Implying that women don’t really know what’s good for them, can’t make their own sexual decisions and therefore need to be protected by others from making „bad“ choices is just misogyny. And that rings true whether it’s the conservative „women have sex to please their husbands and get pregnant, not for enjoyment“ or „sex with someone who doesn’t have a penis can not truly satisfy a woman“ or the terf „touching a penis is always degrading and traumatic to a woman“.
Humans are sexual beings. Most humans have sex. Women are humans.
caats
“sorry i can’t come out, i have plans”
the plans:
The carnivorous faggots over my rotting corpse:
one day, you, tumblr user 1000deer, will deactivate, and the reblogs of this post on tumblr dot com will continue, those rebloggers will be the carnivorous faggots, and you will finally be the rotting corpse
I will outlive your ass bitch the only carnivorous faggot here is me
Reblogged arcalranem
Do you prefer your potions with or without pulp?
i can only assume pulp makes them stronger so im gonna say it depends how much im wanting to feel the potions in that moment
Reblogged shortace
inside me there are two lungs. and one liver. one stomach. a few meters of intestine. there's a lot inside me actually
this is the funniest thing i've read all day
so tru
Reblogged fairykukla
Tumblr staff: ten options is enough for polls, right? No one needs more than that on a regular basis.
The average tumblr user: Hey guys which element of the periodic table do you think is the most fuckable?
Posting hole
yeah yeah carbon nanotubes. but what about the copper nanotubes.
I bet you'd need some high quality copper for that huh?
not again you mesopotamian son of a bitch
Reblogged silverandebony
If you desire you can become...
these are badass as hell I love them