Francis’s friendships with JCR and Blanky (…as well the devotion Jopson has for him) adds so much depth to his character early on, you know? Because for the first half of the show he really isn’t likable. But then you see the easy (or the fanatical) love these guys have for him and you think – there has to be more to this man than what we see to inspire it. And then we get to meet that Francis, from the moment he tells his fellow officers that he is going sober, and it is so beautifully done and so beautiful :’)

Proud to present the literal operning five sentences of a new modern au fitzier I am cooking up.

“And, if I am honest—and I say this with no disrespect to our fearless leader here—it was rather refreshing to not have to check email for three days.” 

His joke lands marvellously and the table erupts into laughter, followed in short order with sizzling, quick-fire, top-notch banter.   

Graham for example has unlocked his phone and is navigating to Google Maps (“where was your cave again?  If we set out now–”) and Hodgson could not agree more (“lads’ trip to [[XX]]!”).  Dundy smacks the table, all mirth, declaring, “gentlemen, we ride at dawn!” while even Francis gives him a fond grin, which for a second makes James feel as if they are the only two people in the room, never mind the bustling restaurant and their six other colleagues right at the table beside them.  Never mind that but thank fuck for the rest—one more day spent alone at home and James might have just lost his mind. 

Next in the anniversary highlights is let yourself be beautiful. This is the second full length fic I wrote for the fandom, and to this day if someone was going to read only one fitzier I wrote, I would wish they read this. The summary (minus the excerpt) goes

Francis’s world is rocked when James abuses his ghost privileges to show up to a ball wearing a splendid dress.

I don’t think that James would identify as a woman or transition in the way we conceptualise these things. At the same time, we did not invent being trans – and so I thought, under what conditions might James show up to a ball in a dress? And what might that mean for James, as well as for Francis from whose POV this story is told?

The result was a messy exploration of gender as well as a love letter to imperfect allies – the ways in which people choose to hide and to be brave, and the power of love (which is where the title comes from after all, and which in turn i chose, in part because the story is in a (one-sided) conversation with one of my favourite films, all of us strangers.)

I had also wanted to write an ambiguous ending to this – which not a single soul who read the story in the past year flagged, but over time I came to realise that that was because I do not think I really wanted the sadder ending for them after all, not in my heart of hearts, and it influenced what’s actually on the page. I even considered editing the ending a little to make the ambiguity more clear but – in the end I did not – let them have their peace and happiness for once after all, however against the odds it may be.

Finally, I am not big on making oc’s but man Mr Williams is so dear to me 🥲

unmoored

Fandom: The Terror (TV 2018)
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Francis Crozier/James Fitzjames
Additional Tags: Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Unreliable Narrator
Word Count: 6,334
Summary:

“It’s hardly good manners, falling asleep in a–” Stranger’s house. Francis did not blame him. “–friend’s house.” But good manners—since when had the two of them ever cared for that, stretching back the first days of their acquaintance? James reached for his pocket watch. “Have I been asleep for long?”

this is apparently what comes out of my brain if i listen to st vincent’s reckless and smoking section on repeat for weeks on end 🤷‍♂️

“God–”  His eyes darted wildly around the room and his voice was hoarse with sleep.

You are safe lad.  We are still on the Enterprise, sailing home.

They had done it a hundred times.  Each time, James would awake with a start, and–

“I am so sorry,” James said now, aghast. 

Francis shook his head.

“Do not be.”

It was not sufficient.  Nothing he did was these days.  He could tell from James’ face—James, who said,

“It’s hardly good manners, falling asleep in a–”  Stranger’s house.  Francis did not blame him.  “–friend’s house.”  But good manners—since when had the two of them ever cared for that, stretching back the first days of their acquaintance?  James reached for his pocket watch.  “Have I been asleep for long?”

The real question he was asking clamped on Francis’ heart as a vice of shame.

No matter.

I have been watching too much foundation of late but consider: fitzier space whump.

They crash land on an uninhabited planet (just the two of them); James has serious internal bleeding but their medbay got fried in the crash and they will never get him help in time

To Francis’ surprise, he laughs all of a sudden – this all makes sense he supposes, he says. He has just remembered that he had made a deal with a bogwitch when he was 8 – that he would die young but he would be thoroughly loved before then (and he’d die in the arms of the one who loved him so). He was so unloved as a child that it seemed to him then a fantastic deal. And Francis knows him like no other; with Francis he has felt seen, down to his most shameful secrets, like with no other. Francis is the one who showed him what to truly care for someone means – his life’s greatest achievement for James.

But all Francis can think in turn is ‘but I haven’t loved him thoroughly’ – he, all too conscious of his past romantic disasters, has been holding himself back, afraid to shake up their (platonic) friendship. Dreamy sigh.

Everyone, stop what you are doing and looks at this gorgeous moodboard @rain-fall-down made for birds of a feather ahhh!!!! 🥺🪽🦭

Francis. James lets out a chattering sound not unlike a huff. We are alive. We can fly. Must you morb? Then, with dismay, with a beady eye fixed on Francis, there is dirt in between my feathers.

in my humble opinion, what we need more of in modern au fitzier fics, is

• James gets very close to dying (parallels canon; we get the handholding, the tears and emotions), and, crucially
• He doesn’t actually die (benefits of modern medicine!!!)

I know I am a hoe for whump all day every day but someone else can also see my vision surely!!!

requiem

Fandom: The Terror (TV 2018)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Francis Crozier & James Clark Ross, Francis Crozier/James Clark Ross, Francis Crozier & James Fitzjames, Francis Crozier/James Fitzjames
Word Count: 1,202
Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, alcohol abuse (referenced), Angst
Summary:

“Mind if I join?”

James. Francis closes his eyes and decides that his friend is wearing his dress uniform; epaulettes a bright golden contrast against the winter skies beyond, ginger hair lustrous, cheeks rosy with the cold and with life. His eyes are piercing as always, and Francis remembers still the precise shape of his smile.

I listened to the public outcry (one anon) and thought i’d clean up build up and post this tumblr ficlet onto ao3 – as a birthday treat for myself if you will 🎈🎂