Soft Skills & Emotional Intelligence

In the U.S., you can grab coffee with a CEO in two weeks. In Europe, it might take two years to get that meeting. I ’ve spent years building relationships across both U.S. and European markets, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: networking looks completely different depending on where you are. The way people connect, build trust, and create opportunities is shaped by culture-and if you don’t adapt your approach, you’ll hit walls fast. So, if you're an executive expanding globally, a leader hiring across regions, or a professional trying to break into a new market-this post is for you. The U.S.: Fast, Open, and High-Volume Americans love to network. Connections are made quickly, introductions flow freely, and saying "let's grab coffee" isn’t just polite—it’s expected. - Cold outreach is normal—you can message a top executive on LinkedIn, and they just might say yes. - Speed matters. Business moves fast, so meetings, interviews, and hiring decisions happen quickly. But here’s the catch: Just because you had a great chat doesn’t mean you’ve built a deep relationship. Trust takes follow-ups, consistency, and results. I’ve seen European executives struggle with this—mistaking initial enthusiasm for long-term commitment. In the U.S., networking is about momentum—you have to keep showing up, adding value, and staying top of mind. In Europe, networking is a long game. If you don’t have an introduction, it’s much harder to get in the door. - Warm introductions matter. Cold outreach? Much tougher. Senior leaders prefer to meet through trusted referrals—someone who can vouch for you. - Fewer, deeper relationships. Once trust is built, it’s strong and lasting—but it takes time to get there. - Decisions take longer. Whether it’s hiring, partnerships, or leadership moves, things don’t happen overnight—expect a longer courtship period. I’ve seen U.S. executives enter the European market and get frustrated fast—wondering why it’s taking months (or years!) to break into leadership circles. But that’s how the market works. The key to winning in Europe? Patience, credibility, and long-term thinking. So, What Does This Mean for Global Leaders? If you’re an American executive expanding into Europe… 📌 Be patient. One meeting won’t seal the deal—you have to earn trust over time. 📌 Get introductions. A warm referral is worth more than 100 cold emails. 📌 Don’t push too hard. European business culture favors depth over speed—respect the process. If you’re a European leader entering the U.S. market… 📌 Don’t wait for permission—reach out. People expect direct outreach and initiative. 📌 Follow up fast. If you’re slow to respond, the opportunity moves on without you. 📌 Be ready to show value quickly. Americans won’t wait months to see if you’re a fit. Networking isn’t just about who you know—it’s about how you build relationships. #Networking #Leadership #ExecutiveSearch #CareerGrowth #GlobalBusiness #US #Europe

One in five British men have no problem using sexist language. Only 14% feel comfortable calling it out when they hear it. Yet over 50% agree that sexist language can be hurtful. The math doesn't add up, does it? CPB London's "Double Standards" campaign exposes something we all know but rarely discuss: the casual sexism hiding in everyday language. The campaign's effectiveness is its simplicity: it shows the stark visual contrast between how we describe the same behavior in men versus women. Their research, conducted by Locaria, revealed the uncomfortable truth about why men use sexist language: → To "be funny" → To show camaraderie and bond with others → To fit in with group dynamics This isn't just about hurt feelings. Language shapes reality. When we casually use words that diminish women, we're not just being "harmlessly" inappropriate. We're reinforcing the very barriers that keep women from reaching their potential. Every "bossy" instead of "decisive." Every "emotional" instead of "passionate." Every piece of casual sexist banter that gets laughed off. It adds up to create environments where women have to work twice as hard to be taken seriously. This isn't just an English-speaking problem. Locaria confirmed that similar double standards exist across French, Arabic, German, Mandarin, Japanese, Italian, and Spanish. This is global. Systemic. Embedded in how we communicate across cultures. Their "Pledge for Positivity" asks people to: → Watch out for hidden sexism in everyday language → Create safe spaces for discussion without finger-pointing → Research the sexist phrases people around them use most → Call out sexist language with sensitivity → Recognize that "harmless banter" isn't harmless What I love about this approach: it's not about shame or blame. It's about awareness and action. Because most sexist language is used unconsciously. People genuinely don't realise the impact of their words. But once you see it, you can't unsee it. The question becomes: what are you going to do about it? Have you noticed double standards in the language used around you? What examples stand out? ♻️ Found this helpful? Repost to share with your network. ⚡ Want more content like this? Hit follow Maya Moufarek.

So shortly before Christmas, it’s a good time to talk about discipline. Not nice perhaps, but useful. Like many other things in life that are not necessarily nice, but useful. As they know in the army, discipline is what it takes to win wars. And we also know it in the gym. No muscle building or losing weight without discipline. In organizations, though, discipline seems like a bad word. It makes us think of aggressive drill instructors, bossy bosses, strict procedures and repetitive work. In short, it stands for everything we want to avoid. Because, what we do want is freedom, greatness and happiness, right? Here’s the paradox: there’s no freedom, greatness or happiness without discipline. As they say, there’s no free lunch. It takes discipline to create freedom, greatness and happiness. Discipline is the starting point of a four-step journey to growth. To achieve growth, you need consistency. To achieve consistency, you need habits, and to achieve habits, you need discipline. This is how it works: Growth is what we want. Not just quantitative growth, but especially qualitative growth, development, and improvement. And not just because we are lucky or the market happens to boom. No, we want steady, predictable growth. To achieve growth we need consistency. Predictable growth requires predictable, consistent results. Not one-off results, large fluctuations, variations across the organization, or unmanageable uncertainties. To achieve consistency, we need habits. Call them routines, standards, or patterns, what matters is that we create standardized, automated behaviors that lead to the consistent results that we want. To achieve habits, we need discipline. Habits don’t develop instantly or without effort. It takes patience, persistence, and often some pain to develop them. Discipline makes sure we continue, even if we don’t feel like it. This applies to every aspect of life. If we want to achieve something significant, it starts with discipline: getting out of bed, living a healthy life, investing in personal development, delivering good work, building an organization, saving the world. Everything starts with discipline. I wish you a disciplined Christmas 🙂! #selfdevelopment #growthmindset #leadershipdevelopment

👗"Jingjin, what are you wearing right now?" The question caught me off guard. It was eight years ago. I was in the office preparing for the upcoming QBR, when my phone rang. It was our division VP. “Can you be in a client meeting this afternoon?” he asked. One of the world’s largest automotive OEMs. High stakes. 200 people are working around the clock to close the deal. I had 6 hours to prepare. My heart raced. This was the kind of meeting that could change many things! Of course, I said yes. Then came the pause. And that question: “What are you wearing right now?” "Is there a dress code?" I laughed. "Kind of..." He continued, a bit apologetically yet firmly: “I need to tell you that the president has a reputation for hitting on women. I want you to be prepared.” Suddenly, my job wasn’t just to represent the business. It was to calculate risk. To protect myself in the room. In those five hours, I still worked on my talking points. But I also asked a junior male colleague to join me, as a buffer and braced myself for inappropriate comments. The meeting went well. I delivered. There were no inappropriate comments But that experience never left me. ... If you're a woman in leadership, you need to prepare for two battles: The work, and the room. And if you're a male leader, your silence is complicity. Here’s what I now teach women privately, and what I wish someone told me earlier: 1. 🛡️ Bring your buffer.    Don’t be afraid to request someone in the room with you, not to assist you technically, but to dilute the power imbalance. It’s not weakness. It’s strategy.     2. 🚫 Pre-empt boundary crossing.    If you’re warned someone is inappropriate, name it before it happens. “Just to clarify, I’ll be focused strictly on business today.” Let them know they won’t get away with casual harassment cloaked as banter.     3. 📍Control the setting when you can.    Suggest public venues, group meetings, or shorter time slots. Private dinners and “casual drinks” are not neutral spaces. Stop feeling guilty for adjusting logistics to protect your dignity.     4. 📝 Write it down.    Any inappropriate comment, no matter how subtle, goes in your private log: date, time, what happened, and who else was there. Not because you’re planning to report it. But because memory fades, and patterns matter.     5. ⚖️ Stop normalizing it.    You’re not “too sensitive.”    You’re not imagining it.    You’re managing two jobs: your work, and your safety.    And the latter is unpaid labor.     If you're still wondering whether gender equity has arrived, ask yourself who’s planning their safety before they speak. And who just gets to speak. 👊 Until the answer is “everyone,” we’re not done.

I was shadowing a coaching client in her leadership meeting when I watched this brilliant woman apologize six times in 30 minutes. 1. “Sorry, this might be off-topic, but..." 2. “I'm could be wrong, but what if we..." 3. “Sorry again, I know we're running short on time..." 4. “I don't want to step on anyone's toes, but..." 5. “This is just my opinion, but..." 6. “Sorry if I'm being too pushy..." Her ideas? They were game-changing. Every single one. Here's what I've learned after decades of coaching women leaders: Women are masterful at reading the room and keeping everyone comfortable. It's a superpower. But when we consistently prioritize others' comfort over our own voice, we rob ourselves, and our teams, of our full contribution. The alternative isn't to become aggressive or dismissive. It's to practice “gracious assertion": • Replace "Sorry to interrupt" with "I'd like to add to that" • Replace "This might be stupid, but..." with "Here's another perspective" • Replace "I hope this makes sense" with "Let me know what questions you have" • Replace "I don't want to step on toes" with "I have a different approach" • Replace "This is just my opinion" with "Based on my experience" • Replace "Sorry if I'm being pushy" with "I feel strongly about this because" But how do you know if you're hitting the right note? Ask yourself these three questions: • Am I stating my needs clearly while respecting others' perspectives? (Assertive) • Am I dismissing others' input or bulldozing through objections? (Aggressive) • Am I hinting at what I want instead of directly asking for it? (Passive-aggressive) You can be considerate AND confident. You can make space for others AND take up space yourself. Your comfort matters too. Your voice matters too. Your ideas matter too. And most importantly, YOU matter. @she.shines.inc #Womenleaders #Confidence #selfadvocacy

❌ I am not a Girlboss, a She-EO, or Bossbabe ❌ I am a founder that has a first-class degree, is building a successful startup, has raised millions in funding, regularly speaks at conferences and events, and has worked hard to build my reputation as a future of work thought leader Yes, my gender counted against me for some of these things, but prefacing my achievements with my gender subtly undermines them And even worse, it encourages the thinking that some of these things only happened because I am a woman "Girlification" is damaging to professional women 💥 Women with feminised job titles aren't taken as seriously 💥 The feminising of job titles makes the defaults male 💥 Most women hate these titles and feel infantilised by them Women deserve the same titles as their male counterparts, and the same level of respect that comes with these titles Or we can start referring to men as Boybosses, He-EOs, or Bropreneurs? Your choice ✌️ Honestly, all of these titles give me the ick 🤮 Flexa #GenderEquality #DiversityEquityInclusion #Startups

Most relationships don’t die from conflict. They die from lack of context. We all know this truth: The quality of your life is deeply tied to the quality of your relationships. But here’s something we don’t talk about enough: The speed with which we build trust in those relationships can be a game-changing advantage. And the not-so-secret key to speeding up trust? Context. When I’ve taken the time to offer context—about what I’m feeling, why I’m acting a certain way, or where I’m coming from—relationships have almost always deepened. When I haven’t? They’ve often faded. Or worse, broken. And it usually happens slowly. Two people talk every day. But over time, the conversations flatten. Not because they care less, but because they stopped sharing context. And when that context fades, connection quietly disappears too. No matter what kind of relationship—friendship, work, family, romantic—when context is missing, connection starts to wither. And when context is shared, even simple moments turn meaningful. Let me show you what I mean. ⸻ Conversation A Alex: Hey, how’s it going? Jordan: All good. You? Alex: Can’t complain. They smile. Maybe chat a bit. But nothing meaningful gets exchanged. It’s polite. Safe. And very forgettable. If this becomes a repeated pattern, the relationship starts to erode. Not because of malice. But because of a lack of shared context. Now flip it. ⸻ Conversation B Alex: Hey, how’s it going? Jordan: Honestly? I’m okay, but a little off today. Alex: Oh? Say more! Jordan: I’ve been juggling too much. Work’s fine, but I feel like I’m constantly reacting instead of thinking deeply. It’s starting to wear on me. Alex: I know exactly what you mean—I felt that way for weeks. Want me to share what helped? … That tiny bit of vulnerability changed everything. The conversation didn’t just pass time. It built trust. It added context. And it strengthened connection. It gave the other person a texture of what you are thinking and feeling. ⸻ We often hold back from sharing what we’re really feeling because we assume it’s “too much” or “too boring.” We say to ourselves, why would that even be interesting to the other person. They are going through so much. But here’s the thing: You’re not oversharing. You’re not burdening them. You’re letting someone in. You’re giving them a map of your life. A deeper understanding. A chance to really know you. If someone cares about you—and wants to build something real with you—context isn’t noise. It’s essential nourishment. One conversation with context might be interesting. But 50 conversations with context? That’s how trust and familiarity is built to create a strong bond. That’s how teams click. That’s how friendships last. So remember this: Don’t deprive people of context. You’re not just talking about your day. You’re building something that will enrich both your lives. Set context. It matters. And it’s one of the most generous—and underrated—gifts we can give each other.

𝐍𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐫 𝐍𝐚𝐦𝐞-𝐃𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠? We all know that networking is key to career growth. But let’s be real—some people treat it like a transactional game rather than building meaningful relationships. When I first started networking, I thought it was all about connecting with big names and sending cold DMs. Turns out, that’s not how real relationships are built. Here’s what I’ve learned about networking with integrity and respect: 🔹 𝟭. 𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗽 𝗧𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗣𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗟𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗦𝘁𝗲𝗽𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀 🚫 We’ve all seen it—someone connects with you today and asks for a favor tomorrow. ✔ Instead, build relationships before you need them. ✔ Offer value before asking for help. ✔ Engage genuinely—not just when you need something. 🔹𝟮. 𝗚𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗕𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗧𝗮𝗸𝗲 🤝 Want someone to remember you? Help them first. ✔ Share an opportunity. ✔ Introduce them to someone useful. ✔ Engage with their work meaningfully. Networking is a two-way street. If you only show up when you need a job or referral, people will notice—and avoid you. 🔹 𝟯. 𝗔𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗢𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗔𝗴𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗦𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 🎙️ There’s a difference between showcasing your work and shameless bragging. ✔ Focus on sharing insights, not just achievements. ✔ Celebrate others’ success, not just your own. ✔ Be someone people want to associate with. 🔹 𝟰. 𝗥𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝗕𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀, 𝗘𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗢𝗻𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲 🚦 ✔ Cold messaging? Make it personalized, not copy-paste. ✔ Asking for a coffee chat? Be clear about your intent. ✔ Got a ‘No’ or no response? Move on, don’t chase. 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙂𝙤𝙡𝙙𝙚𝙣 𝙍𝙪𝙡𝙚: 𝙉𝙚𝙩𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙠 𝙇𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙖 𝙃𝙪𝙢𝙖𝙣, 𝙉𝙤𝙩 𝙖 𝙎𝙖𝙡𝙚𝙨 𝙋𝙞𝙩𝙘𝙝. 𝙊𝙥𝙥𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙪𝙣𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙚𝙨 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙗𝙪𝙞𝙡𝙙 𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙨𝙩, 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨. #Networking #CareerGrowth #BuildingRelationships

She said yes to every single project. Yet, she was overlooked for the promotion. They said: “She’s irreplaceable.” “We’d be lost without her.” But when it came time to lead the next big thing - She wasn’t even on the list. Over the past decade working in women’s leadership, I’ve seen this story play out far too often. Women staying in roles long past their expiration. Not because they lack clarity - But because they’ve been conditioned to confuse loyalty with worth. Loyalty to a team. To a leader. To a company culture that praises their reliability... But never promotes their vision. So how do you ensure you’re valued - not just used - for all that you bring to the table? Here are 5 practical, research-backed strategies I’ve seen top performers consistently use: ✅ Be Known for Vision, Not Just Execution ↳ “She delivers” is solid. ↳ “She sets the direction” is strategic. ↳ Build a reputation rooted in foresight - not just follow-through. ✅ Document and Distill Your Wins ↳ Don’t wait to be noticed. ↳ Capture and communicate your impact consistently. ↳ Think: outcomes, initiatives, feedback snapshots. ↳ This becomes your proof of value during reviews, promotions, or pivots. ✅ Speak the Language of Business ↳ Translate your work into metrics that matter: revenue, retention, growth, efficiency. ↳ When leaders see your contribution tied to business outcomes, you shift from “nice to have” to “can’t afford to lose.” ✅ Build Cross-Functional Credibility ↳ Influence isn’t built in silos. ↳ Make your value visible across teams. ↳ When multiple departments rely on your insight, you become a strategic connector - not just a contributor. ✅ Create Strategic Allies, Not Just Mentors ↳ Power isn’t just about performance - it’s about proximity to influence. ↳ Nurture relationships with decision-makers, peer champions, and collaborators. Influence grows through meaningful connection. The truth is - being essential isn’t the same as being seen. You can be deeply loyal to others - and still loyal to your own growth. These shifts aren’t just career strategies. They’re acts of self-respect. Because when you decide to lead from alignment, not obligation - You stop waiting to be chosen. And start choosing yourself. 💬 Which of these strategies feels most relevant to where you are right now? I’d love to hear in the comments below. ♻ Repost if you believe it’s time to stop rewarding quiet loyalty - and start recognizing conscious leadership. 🔔 Follow me, Bhavna Toor, for more. 📩 DM me to bring our holistic leadership development programs to your organization - that are a powerful combination of inner-work and real-world strategy.

When you’re an international woman in leadership, when is it bad to be good? And, most importantly, when is it good to be BaD? Don’t get me wrong, BaD doesn’t mean “bad”. It means quite the opposite. It means “Bold and Daring”. Not “Bold and Daring” in a superhero kind of way. We don't need a cape. But simply a BOLDER kind of clarity in meetings, presentations and calls, by DARING to move away from certain “good girl” behaviours and focus on 2 things: connection & impact. So to be clear, BaD leadership ISN’T about being impulsive, disrespectful or arrogant. It’s about (amongst others): - sharing your valuable ideas clearly without permission or apology. - using assertive empathy in difficult conversations and disagreements. - knowing how to gracefully break into discussions & hold off interruptions. And you know what else? The first step to becoming a BaD leader isn’t to learn more English. It’s to see and UNLEARN the unspoken rules we have for ourselves; those words we thought made us “bigger” but, instead, have kept us small.   You can find 4 of the most popular ones in the carousel. But please don’t stop there. Keep looking for the words that don’t work at work and wash away that old, outdated graffiti from the walls of your mind. PS: I’m on a mission: to help as many #goodgirlsgoBaD in their Business English as possible. Want to join me? What’s your view: what other “good girl behaviours” do we need to unlearn?   -------------------------------------------------- Hi, I’m Kelly. I help international women in leadership stop polishing and perfecting their English and start using the English they already have… in a more powerful way. #businessenglish #womeninbusiness #leadershipdevelopment #breakthegoodgirlmyth